am i deserve to tell this story?
am i deserve to tell this story that i can't undergo now?
am i deserve to tell this story that i don't deserve to undergo now?

it's chaotic.
it's getting chaotic more and more.
every time i get sinned, i make me feel chaotic more and more.
i don't know how i should live from then on.

the existence i devastate is not only EVERYONE else, but also me.
the existence i must apologize is not only EVERYTHING else, but also me.
i want to apologize. i don't want to devastate anyone, anymore.